Determined To Find A Life In 2010

Let me see.  That gives me ten years to find a new life.  One might ask what is wrong with the one I have?  What is not wrong would be a better question.  My son has been a drug user since his high school days.  I had him in and out of drug rehabs until I understood that he only learned about a new drug in there.  Yep, just as soon as he was out, he was on to trying the latest drug that he learned about in rehab.

My front door has revolved with him in and out of it for years.  He would find a way to get inside after I had said no a hundred times.  Mom, I just need a place to stay for a couple of days.  That would turn into a few weeks.  After that length of time, I would be stark raving crazy and would put his things out and change the locks.  The last time he wanted to come live with me, he had a baby daughter with him.  His girl friend wasn’t stable enough to care for her.  He thought he was.  I ended up taking care of the precious baby.  Then one day he came home after being out with her for a weekend and told me that he was using again and needed help.  Help?  Right.  How many times had I heard that?

I called DHR (Children Services) and took the child and sent his butt to the curb.  No.  I will not listen to I need your help any longer.  Long story short, he doesn’t have the child and neither do I.  As long as she was in my care, he came and went around here as he pleased.  I couldn’t take it.  Why?  I don’t like him.  Why should I?  All I have to do to be reminded of my life with him is to raise a photo on any wall in my home to see the hole that he put their with his fist.  Yes, I kept those holes for a reason.  I could have patched them but they serve a better purpose by not being patched.

Now the child is living with her mother’s grandmother.  The mom lives with them.  The good thing  is a grandfather is involved.  He makes her toe the line.  She can go to work but when she is home in his house, she has to take care of the baby.  Good for a strong-minded man.  I visited her last week.  She seemed happy.  We played and danced and sang Barney songs on the porch.  I know in my heart that I will not be allowed to come and go in her life.  That family will not let me.  Oh, did I mention that my son doesn’t know it the child is his?  Hopefully, that will come up in court before too long.

I also had a person scam me into staying with me for a month while he waited on his bank account to be transferred and credit cards to arrive.  Right.  They never arrived.  I kicked him out too.  A shame that he wasn’t a good guy because he was a great cook and loved to help wash the dishes.  Other than that, he was worthless.  Hey, I am just telling it like it is.

So, I am interested in getting my head on straight because it seems to have SUCKER written across it.  I wonder if I could get it off with some good strong detergent or if I will need plastic surgery?  Hey, maybe some of that makeup for people with scars will help until I can figure out what is wrong with me in the shrink’s office.

Happy New year folks.  I am on my way to a better life in two-thousand-ten.  Goodness gracious but that is weird in print.

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. PΔUL
    Jan 06, 2010 @ 06:06:30

    They say what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, well you must be one invincible lady. That would have seen for most folks, but her you are trying to find a bright side to it all.
    Good for you. Happy 2010.


    • sassysweetbren
      Jan 06, 2010 @ 11:46:43

      Paul, thanks for reminding me of being a positive person. I lose site of that sometimes. ha ha


  2. Young Werther
    Jan 03, 2010 @ 20:44:11

    It’s better to have loved, than not, better to have attempted and failed than forever wondering “what if”….

    No, you do not have Sucker tattooed on your forehead!


    • sassysweetbren
      Jan 04, 2010 @ 23:50:21

      Love is like putting money in the bank. We expect a return on our deposit. If we don’t get a return, we change banks. See my point my dear friend Young?


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